Lead, Lead, Lead, Flower or Weed

This next post comes from a little bit of frustration I've been experiencing.  Recently, the main organization I am involved in had elections for leadership positions.  I worked really hard, prepared, and put my all into getting a position and ended up with nothing.  This isn't the first time this has happened either.  I am beyond frustrated.  I knew it was a risk putting all of my chips on the table, but I never thought I would walk away with empty pockets.  I care so much about this organization and I want so much to help it grow and make it better.  Now I feel powerless to do anything and honestly I'm a little lost right now.

But when I reached out to those who were in charge of appointing positions I found a brick wall.  I just wanted to know one thing:  why was I not fit for this position?  I want to know for personal reasons so I can learn from this and improve myself so this doesn't happen again.  However, the first person I met with seemed to refuse to give me a definite answer.  The second person, who had a direct hand in elections, seems to be avoiding me.  I've been in contact and set up a meeting time 3 times, and all of them have been pushed back.  And now I don't even have a time anymore.  I feel that I have a right to know this information and I the fact that these people aren't giving me this frustrates me to no end.  I've taken leadership classes and seminars and the thing I've learned is that as a leader, you should be looking out for the well-being of your followers.  It's a matter of doing what you say you will do.  Don't make the statement "If you have any questions about this contact me and we'll talk" if you never intend on talking with them.  A leader should try to make each of his or her followers feel like they are an important part of the organization, and after all the work I've done I feel thrown to the side.

I was hoping for a flower to talk to, someone who is continually growing, changing and adding to the plants around it.  Instead I got a weed, someone who slowly poisons the plants that are close.

We need a gardener in my organization, otherwise our whole plot will die.